That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
