i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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