this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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