You're completely useless in the revolution.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
