Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
