I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
look no pants
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
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