he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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