you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
