I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
