the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Mom said you looked used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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