Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
