wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize