people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Randomize