Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
