How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize