We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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