I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
