hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
