You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
