PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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