First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
