It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
