I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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