we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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