bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
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