that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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