I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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