I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.