can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I want her autograph on my taint
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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