My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Randomize
