In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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