i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
