Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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