i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm too high and old for this...
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
The adults are the big ones right?
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