loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
