So drunk its hurt
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize