i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
