But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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