he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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