I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize