i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
