I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Randomize
