I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
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I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
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He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize