When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
