Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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