you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
