Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
