There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
