dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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