And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize