found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
